Your self-talk frames the way you approach a problem, and deal with the consequences. Here are some weasel phrases we often use to undercut our own motivation, and their empowering counterparts. Change the way you frame a problem, and boost your success.
I don’t have time for that.
Replace this weasel phrase with “That’s not a priority for me.” Try it out now. Say it a few times out loud even!
Honesty (even with yourself) really is the best policy. Once you face the facts, might make you make exercise, prayer, etc good habit a priority
You also don’t have to feel guilty about saving time and energy for your select priorities. Boundaries are a good thing. Don’t be ashamed for guarding what you value.
We can’t afford that.
Instead say (more cheerfully this time) “We don’t buy X, so that we can Y.”
Perhaps you want to pay off debt. Or you are saving long-term for retirement or college funds. You have short-term goals like a newer van, furniture, or a trip back home to see family. Whatever your goals are, remind yourself of them. Leverage the happy anticipation of planned future goals, to step away from a spur of the moment expense.
On a parenting note, you also don’t want to say “we can’t afford that” to your kids. It might send them into an anxious spiral, to the point of waking up in the night to clip coupons, and worrying about foreclosure. Happened to a friend of mine. True story.
I can’t eat that.
Next time you are confronted with a hankering for cheesecake, garlic bread, or your favorite diet-busting kryptonite, say “I don’t eat X, so that I can Y.”
Just as with budgeting above, we leverage our future happiness into self-control success today. Remind yourself where you want to be in a year, if you stick to your eating plan today. Everybody’s definition of success is unique. Maybe it’s being able to ride all the roller coasters on the family trip to Disney. Fitting back in your pre-baby dress size. Or just having the stamina to run around at the park with your kids. We all have a dream. Instead of wallowing in deprivation, remind yourself of it.
“It’s just too hard to _______”
What you really mean is that the scope of the issue is overwhelming. You just don’t know where to begin! I can do _______, if I know the first few steps.
Once you say that, the logical response is to find out where to start with…
-writing a blog
-deepening your prayer life
-doing zumba (or is this just me?)
Once you get started, momentum will build quickly! Pin the image below for a handy reminder.
What are some ways you talk yourself out of success? Rephrase your self-talk, and reframe the issue today!